To see this in writing was a shock to my system. But there it was....on my State Farm Insurance paper. Anna Tyson...Divorced white female. God...isn't that terrible? Today...on my facebook timehop....it brought back a memory from two years ago that I had written.
"March....you have kicked my butt. You have hurt me while I was down. You have turned my life upside down. April....I am ready for the new changes you bring. Ready to start this new life."
To see this and the divorced white female? Some shit was coming back. And not in a good way.
Then I go off and watch "Big Little Lies" on HBO. If you haven't watched it...do. If you haven't read the book...do that to. It brought up more shit.
But then....I started to throw away the shit. It doesn't get to ruin my day anymore. NO MORE!
These two years of being a divorced white female has changed my life...for the better. I got away from an awful marriage. One that was very manipulative and controlling. One that didn't let me be me. God I wish I had had the guts to get out by myself. I wish I had been the one to see it and get away. But....fucktard is older and wiser right? (Fuck that shit.)
I got out of a very terrible friendship. I was being used. So much. By a very selfish person. One that only cared about himself. I thought I would be his best friend forever. But a selfish person isn't there for you when you are knocked down on your hardest. A true friend is there. Through out all the ugly. And he wasn't.
But....I got better friends. My Home Team. Women who are there for me no matter what. Women who stand by their fellow friend holding her up while she picks up the pieces of her sad life. Women who will fight with you right there, with no judgment. Women who will cry and laugh with you, even if it is in public at the cry table!
I got my precious Jade. My precious baby. My cat. Never could have a cat to love while married. Nothing that I wanted was important. But I get her now. She is my true friend. With me no matter what....unless she's hungry...then there is some hating going on.
I got the man of my dreams. One who makes me laugh and who will nerd out with me with my weird, scary movies and tv, one who will listen to me even though I ramble and ramble, one who loves me even though I am a fatty mcfatty, one I can share anything with and know he won't judge me or tell me to be a lady, one that let's me be me.
So yeah...I might be a divorced white female but you know what? It's fucking awesome. (And by the way....I am 1% Jewish so "white" is not okay!)
L'chaim
"March....you have kicked my butt. You have hurt me while I was down. You have turned my life upside down. April....I am ready for the new changes you bring. Ready to start this new life."
To see this and the divorced white female? Some shit was coming back. And not in a good way.
Then I go off and watch "Big Little Lies" on HBO. If you haven't watched it...do. If you haven't read the book...do that to. It brought up more shit.
But then....I started to throw away the shit. It doesn't get to ruin my day anymore. NO MORE!
These two years of being a divorced white female has changed my life...for the better. I got away from an awful marriage. One that was very manipulative and controlling. One that didn't let me be me. God I wish I had had the guts to get out by myself. I wish I had been the one to see it and get away. But....fucktard is older and wiser right? (Fuck that shit.)
I got out of a very terrible friendship. I was being used. So much. By a very selfish person. One that only cared about himself. I thought I would be his best friend forever. But a selfish person isn't there for you when you are knocked down on your hardest. A true friend is there. Through out all the ugly. And he wasn't.
But....I got better friends. My Home Team. Women who are there for me no matter what. Women who stand by their fellow friend holding her up while she picks up the pieces of her sad life. Women who will fight with you right there, with no judgment. Women who will cry and laugh with you, even if it is in public at the cry table!
I got my precious Jade. My precious baby. My cat. Never could have a cat to love while married. Nothing that I wanted was important. But I get her now. She is my true friend. With me no matter what....unless she's hungry...then there is some hating going on.
I got the man of my dreams. One who makes me laugh and who will nerd out with me with my weird, scary movies and tv, one who will listen to me even though I ramble and ramble, one who loves me even though I am a fatty mcfatty, one I can share anything with and know he won't judge me or tell me to be a lady, one that let's me be me.
So yeah...I might be a divorced white female but you know what? It's fucking awesome. (And by the way....I am 1% Jewish so "white" is not okay!)
L'chaim
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